sometimes i talked things seriously.

today i had sleeping disorder. i slept too late and ended waking up too early. i planned to finish goddamn module on pump design but yet im writing this with another section to be explained. and my brain cannot work on it anymore. its not that i lost in the unit conversion totally, iam just too tired and preferred the double bed rather than the white cushion.

yesterday i dwell on things that already written by history. i dwell a lot until my heart stopped beating and my throat was stuck with no words. no i shouldn' t do that. life is too short for me to keep looking at the past. i shouldn't be ordinary girl.there was the man.i owe him a big apology all these years. and to the man of my dream, i seek forgiveness from you. its never been my intention to never understand the freaky important things. i don't have any reasons. terribly i swear.

tonight i am thinking. how do you go through the four years away? i have been wanting to be here where i am now just because i want to be in your shoes. the feelings of you by living afar. it is hard when i think hard, and it is always a joy when you are "here" to accompany. when are we going to hold hands again?

i never good at writing. i hate to read when i know how to ride. my Malay literature was always top at class, but i now forget how to spell "menggerakkan". is it with a single k or it needs another companion? i am just totally sucked. mother said life is a learning path, everyday is a learning thing and continuously i need to practice. i guess i had stopped practicing a long time ago that makes the whole writing thing a chaos. and when i tried to recall all the doa recital that i used to say it out loud with great confidence, the recital is mixed with each other. is God going to take away all my great things or i am the one too lazy to improvise on it everyday?

life is a path. it is too short to be ordinary. i just want to hold the hands. and reaching the stars that i have been dreaming of. shooting the stars in 2 years time. maybe. insyaALLAH.